Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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