I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize