and you said cock pushups were impossible
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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