so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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