Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
