she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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