This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
