look no pants
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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