I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Randomize