If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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