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Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
