I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize