In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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