HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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