"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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