Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
