Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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