My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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