just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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