dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
