Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
