Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
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THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
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He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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