hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
