this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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