marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
if only i could text you this smell
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
