Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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