Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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