got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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