So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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