I puked a lego.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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