you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize