I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
