no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
