its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
