I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
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