Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
