I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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