Sponge bath it is.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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