I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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