Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
