Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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