she was so not down for the gang bang
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
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I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
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My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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