I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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