I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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