I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize