This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
