YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
