Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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