So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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