Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize
