Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
